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THE LETTER

Sometimes me tinks if oi cud git 'eadaches ye'd be me biggest wan.  You've got wan av master lives available, an' yer canny stop cnawvshawlin'.   Yer shud also forgive yisser past meltin' ones includin' de wan yer deemed de biggest electric fence yer ever full on.  After al', it wus in yisser contract for de sake av learnin', an' ter make yer waaat yer are an' 'ill be.  Yer asked for it, yer got it, even though we advised yer against yisser present sojourn.  Tank de gods 'tis yisser last, since quite frankly, yer are a 'andful.  Oi canny leave yer alone for two minutes, me wee landmine in 'uman form.

Yer 'av greater sovereignty, more time nigh due ter yisser past, more freedom, an' everythin' yer nade withoyt bein' a 'ostage ter fortune.  Yer 'av a life many wud kill for, provided they 'av 'alf a braincell.  Not only dat, yer 'av somethin' av a roadmap in life, an' dependin' on waaat yer ask me, sometimes i'll even gie yer de answer.  Don't forget, yer work wan fourth as much as yisser average breeder.

Yer were guided ter clap waaat is illusory, pointless, an' dense.  Yer stopped doin' de inane soshal rituals at a young age, seein' 'oy unpragmatic they were.  Yer didn't waste yisser time on fittin' into a construct av mortal flotsam idiocy whaich yer 'eld in contempt, an' 'av a far easier life for it. bein' reverse programmed.  Yer are on top av a stoney mountain, watchin' de village burn below, in analogy.  Quit yisser bitchin', for i'll collect yer soon enough.  Yer still 'enny foun' inner peace, an' you're not leavin' yisser self-imposed prison dat yer begged for, an' you're 'eadin' nowha 'til yer chucker.  Oi'm also 'opin' you'll make way more sense whaen we meet again on mutual terms.  Nigh git over yerself for gettin' waaat yer begged for.  

Slán go fóill

 

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